Some thoughts...

It's been awhile since I've written and so many times, I find myself thinking, "I need to write a post about that..."
So, here is my post about all of "that" - in no particular order.

Today, after someone asked me about the changes we've made to our home, she said, "You know, in a way, this could end up being a blessing."  I'd just like to add that to the list of things you should never say to someone who has lost her home to a fire.  Have we made positive changes?  Yes.  Are we saving ourselves years of home improvement projects?  Yes.  But that fire was and never will be a "blessing."  Trust me when I say those home projects could wait.

Similar to that, people have made several comments about how at least it's nice that I get to go shopping or that I have new stuff.  But people aren't really thinking it through when they make those comments. Everyone loves new clothes and new shoes.  But everyone also has that one pair of jogging pants she's had for years because its just so comfortable...  that one pair of boots that are the perfect blend of stylish and comfortable, which took many neglected pairs of boots and many different shoe stores to find... that "go to" black dress for nights when you want to look nice... that scarf, that sweater, that necklace that has some kind of emotional connection to it that makes you cling to it even years after you've stopped wearing it.  And then there are the things we don't think about...  When I went to replenish my closet in August, I didn't think about buying gloves.  I went a few weeks in December desperate for gloves until I got the opportunity to buy some.  Similarly, I forgot about rain books until I practically ruined a pair of pants walking through a rain storm.  Bras are impossible to buy online and yet I have no time to get to a mall, so I'm struggling in that department.  There's just so much.  When people seem jealous of my "new clothes," I wish they'd really stop and think about losing everything in their closet in exchange for a few new items.

On a more positive note, last week, we got walls!!  The dry wall finally went up.  That's been my dream since this happened - I wanted it to look like a home again.  It's finally starting to. The day that I went to see the drywall, I walked upstairs and stood in Emerson's old nursery and suddenly I was crying.  Tears were rolling down my cheeks and I couldn't figure out why.  I still can't really articulate it, but it was a blend of both good and bad emotions.  The walls made it look more like home, which brought back to reality what we lost.  It also made the changes come to life, which was fun but also made me miss the way it was.  They were also happy tears because it meant we were that much closer to being home.  It was an emotional moment for me, indeed.

I keep getting emotional about Moe.  I think it's the holidays.  Moe loved sitting under the Christmas tree.  It looks really empty without him.

This Friday, Jesse and I are going shopping to try to catch after Christmas sales on our home products.  That should be exciting!!

I'm falling asleep at the laptop - (life is pretty crazy right now around Christmas!) - so I better go.  Until next time... which will hopefully be sooner...